Essential Readings on Stress and Coping Among
Parents of Deaf and Hearing-Impaired Children
Editor's Foreword
Idalia Mapp
| Parents look forward to having a child who is healthy (five fingers and toes, no neurological problems, and with all the physical attributes of a human being). Some children, however, are born with genetic or congenital hearing loss; and on occasion, due to illnesses such as meningitis, a child might lose his or her hearing at a relatively early age in life. A parent’s reaction to his or her child’s hearing loss may vary, but many mothers and fathers react with shock and disbelief. The disappointment of having a “less than perfect” child drives some parents to mourn the child’s hearing loss, the way in which they might grieve the death of a child. In addition, in the midst of dealing with the natural development of a child—as well as with the process of parent-child bonding and relationship formation—these parents are often confronted with having to meet their child’s additional hearing needs, such as audiological evaluation appointments, hearing aid fittings, and speech and communication classes, among many others. The parents’ time and attention are not limited to their child’s hearing needs, of course; they also are confronted with struggling to understand the nature of the hearing loss and the numerous emotions they are experiencing, which were brought on by the stressful news of learning that they have a deaf or hearing-impaired child. Dealing with this news can be sudden and, at times, surprising; it may also add stress to daily life events. This is not an easy task for parents to deal with, and thus forces many mothers and fathers to search for untapped strengths and internal resources, as well as to seek support from both family and external sources. In general, parents cope with their child’s hearing loss differently. While working at a school for the deaf and completing my dissertation for a Ph.D. in Social Work at New York University, I had the opportunity to interview many parents of deaf and hearing-impaired children. To my surprise, some spoke of the joy, responsibility and dedication they felt for what they considered a gift from God—to be chosen for a such special task as caring for and raising a child with a hearing loss; other parents, in contrast, viewed their child’s hearing loss as the cross they would have to bear with pride and honor. The majority of parents, however, shared the grief and pain of having a less than perfect child. Some blamed their partners while others were struck by guilt and made repeated attempts to review their life—especially during the pregnancy—in an attempt to pinpoint what they did wrong and understand if their punishment was merited. One parent, whom I would describe as well educated and sophisticated, expressed the profound sentiment that a parent may learn to cope with a child’s deafness, but the idea that one reaches the point of acceptance is false, because acceptance is never attained. This book was developed foremost to address issues related to the many stresses confronted by parents with a deaf or hearing-impaired child, by bringing together a rich collection of authoritative articles in one convenient volume. The purpose of this book is to help parents, as well as students and professionals, better understand the stressful emotions parents experience and the different measures they use as individuals, both to cope with their feelings and meet the complex needs of their children. |